For my Final Project, I wanted to explore my insecurities. I grew up fascinated by the idea of my own existence, so I often stared at myself in the mirror. I loved the way I looked. As I grew up, however, I began to doubt this feeling. I began to think I was unattractive. While I understand my worth is more than my appearance, I sometimes felt inferior because of this.

It’s always a pleasant surprise when people tell me they think of me as a very confident person. It helps me remember that I’m the only person who doubts myself. I’m the only one who sees my faults, and if that’s so, are they (my flaws) really so bad? I’m sure everyone has experienced something like this:

You speak negatively about yourself in some way, for example, your handwriting. However, when you say so, everyone is shocked because they think your handwriting is amazing…

… Isn’t there a bit of a disconnect between the reality you perceive and what everyone else sees? You think it’s horrible, but no one else does! I think that disconnect is enough reason to reconsider your feelings about your handwriting, or whatever else you’re doubtful of.

I’m still learning how to accept praise. I love feedback in general, but compliments about my appearance are particularly difficult to accept because I feel like an imposter who doesn’t deserve them. However, the truth of someone else’s praise isn’t for me to speculate because it’s their opinion… And if they think I’m cute, who am I to tell them they’re wrong?

  • “asymmetrical”
One of my biggest insecurities is how asymmetrical my face is. I hate that one eye is lower than the other, that my mouth looks crooked, and that my jaw seems to jut out on the right. It makes me feel like a Mr. Potato Head toy.
  • “double chin”
  • “sharp jaw”
I hate that I have a double chin, but love the sharpness of my jawline. It’s interesting that such close features can “look” so different.
I loved the way I looked in a wig because I could cover up the sides of my wide face. But, when the wig came off, I was forced to realize that my face was different from the illusion I created.
  • “small”
  • “uneven”
  • “round”
  • “sagging”
What do these adjectives mean to you? To me, they’re words I’ve used to criticize my appearance. Are they wrong? Do they matter?
  • dysmorphia

The blemishes I feel insecure about might not be flaws to you. Similarly, the things you’re insecure about may appear gorgeous to me. When I look in the mirror, sometimes I don’t even look like myself… so why should I feel insecure about a reflection that isn’t me?

References/Inspiration