Katie X (Xiaohui Wang), Lies and Disguises and My Secret (Sacred) Hiding Place, 2021, Site specific installation of woodblock print and oil pastel rubbing on paper, wood and wax sculpture, birch trunk slice, yew branches, and pinecones

 

 

Pangolins are curious creatures. These reptilian looking mammals have been walking the earth for millions of years, shielded by their armor of scales and are practically invincible to all predators, except for humans. Pangolins are the most trafficked mammals in the world, poached mainly for their scales which are believed to have medicinal benefits or magical power. Their protective armor becomes their greatest weakness.

I have always seen the pangolin as my spirit animal, strange, solitary, gentle. Growing up in China where individuality is suppressed and self-expression discouraged, I learned to hide my true self to survive, despite never being good at it. As a neurodivergent person, my eccentric behavior and inappropriate emotions made me a target, no matter how much I wished to just blend in, and all the clumsy lies and disguises made me stand out even more. I feel extremely lucky to have discovered art and realized the value of my uniqueness. The care, understanding and respect among artists can melt the strongest of armors. Art becomes my sanctuary where I could be safe and free, be independent and still be loved, and most importantly, be weird, and be proud, because “Where there’s a monster, there’s a miracle.”